Dating Mythbusters: There Is a Better Half Out There for You

Have you ever been single at any point, and friends or family look at you as if you're not so much missing a partner as minus a limb?! You must enjoy a loving, committed relationship to be happy. If a particular romance has ended, you may well feel pressured into 'getting back in the saddle.' In other words, the natural thing to do is head to the nearest dating site for singles, where your better half waits patiently for you to introduce yourself.

Let's take a step back from these one-dimensional attitudes. Rather than clamber into any metaphorical saddle, have you ever announced you were content alone, if only for an unspecified period? If this provokes stunned expressions amongst your buddies, perhaps the time has come to explain why this whole 'better half out there' attitude is nothing but a myth that needs to be busted!

You're putting non-existent people on a pedestal.

The implication is that you must be part of a partnership to have any currency in your social circle. What makes this especially problematic is that you are being asked to take your place in a partnership that doesn't exist. It's one thing to refer to a better half when you know all about their personality and they've actually behaved in a way to merit praise. But the whole scenario is ridiculous if this person is merely a figment of someone's imagination. Worse than that, it won't do much for your self-esteem if you're constantly reminded you'll only become a natural person once you're united with this mythical other half.

A 'better half' is too much responsibility.

The clue is in the title. A better half implies someone with admirable character traits. But life is far more complicated than that. If only everyone were guaranteed to be matched with a knight in shining armor who would lift them out of their sad single status! Referring to someone as a better half places a lot of responsibility on their shoulders. What happens if you get involved with someone with particular flaws? There is nothing wrong with that at all. It's called living in the real world.

Forget external happiness; think of number one.

The whole point of this myth is that there is a better half out there just waiting for you to discover them as if you're in some kind of fairy story, which implies you will only ever find true happiness once you have tracked this person down. This does negate your own aspirations. While it may be tempting to assume you'd only be better off when you come across someone you can enjoy a relationship with, this attitude is demeaning because it thinks you will never be satisfied as a single person. If so, how do you explain why many single people lead deeply fulfilling lives?

Appreciate there's more to life than being part of an item

If you're concerned about the requirement to seek a better half, remember being an item is not a default position. People are single for all manner of reasons. Some might have just come out of a relationship. Others choose to be single because they prefer having the freedom to choose their own path. There is no right or wrong. And indeed, there is no such thing as myths.