It’s safe to say AKA and Bonang are the “IT” couple in Mzansi currently. It’s not only their fans who believe that, the couple itself knows it too. Ever wondered how the couple see themselves? Here are 3 powerful words Bonang and AKA use to describe their relationship.
Bonang took to Instagram to share recent photos of the couple and the captions caught our attention more. Check them out below.
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1. Power
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They both are powerful in their expertise, put them together, that’s real POWER!
Power differs across relationship domains.
Does your boyfriend make most decisions about weekend plans, while you’re in charge of financial decisions? Dividing up power in different domains is typical in relationships.
Established couples need to make decisions in numerous aspects of their lives together, and each of these domains has its own power structure. After surveying about 100 individuals, a few decision domains emerged as important for most couples. These included: how couples spend time together; how they demonstrate affection; how much time they spend together; managing interactions with family and friends; making future plans about careers or moving; religion or value decisions; finances; and household tasks. (For couples with children, childrearing was another important decision domain.)
Power includes the decision process.
How do you make decisions in your relationship? Who writes the pros/cons lists? The process of researching or presenting options may have power differentials, outside of the actual final outcome of any one decision.
Power reflects interdependence.
It’s not enough to focus on one person’s dispositional tendency towards influencing or being deferential. A complete understanding of power in a relationship requires a study of each person’s power within the context of the other person’s power. How you view your own power and your partner’s power may affect your partner’s perceptions of power.
Resisting influence is a type of power.
We tend to think of power as persuasion, but that’s not the only type of power. The ability to resist your partner’s ideas, counter their suggestions, or veto their decisions is also an important type of relationship power.
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2. Love
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Love is one of Bonang’s favorite words and their together is undeniable.
All About Love in Relationships
Love is one of the most profound emotions known to human beings. There are many kinds of love, but most people seek its expression in a romantic relationship with a compatible partner. For some, romantic relationships are the most meaningful element in their lives, providing a source of deep fulfillment. The ability to have a healthy, loving relationship is not innate.
A great deal of evidence suggests that the ability to form a stable relationship begins in infancy, in a child's earliest experiences with a caregiver who reliably meets the infant's needs for food, care, protection, stimulation, and social contact. Those relationships are not destiny, but they appear to establish patterns of relating to others. Failed relationships happen for many reasons, and the failure of a relationship is often a source of great psychological anguish. Most of us have to work consciously to master the skills necessary to make them flourish.
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3. Culture
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They do this for the culture yoh!
Dealing with Cultural Differences in a Relationship. Cultureinvolves the beliefs, behaviors and values of a particular social group. Our cultural identity may include (but is not limited to) nationality, religion, gender, race, political affiliation, ethnicity and socioeconomic class.
Keeping Differences from Causing Division
Understand and Explore
Inter-cultural relationships provide the opportunity to gain an in-depth appreciation of other customs. Celebrate the festivities unique to your partner’s homeland or religious tradition. Spend time getting to know his/her family. Savor the foods from your partner’s native country. You don’t necessarily have to adopt all of your significant other’s cultural practices. However, willingness to understand your partner’s culture demonstrates love and respect.
Respect Differences
Legitimate cultural differences exist and should not be glossed over; however, neither should these differences be blown out of proportion. If and when differing perspectives arise, seek to understand, rather than to judge.
Look for Commonalities
While it is important to be aware of culture differences, also look for common ground. Identify similar values, preferences and interests. You don’t have to share everything with your partner; however, sharing certain core values (such as honesty, hard work, charity, etc.) can help reduce tension in your relationship.
Keep What Matters Most to You
While understanding your partner’s culture is important, you shouldn’t feel pressured to discard cherished parts of your own cultural traditions. Inter-cultural relationships require compromise but should not force one party to abandon core parts of his/her identity.
Don’t Make Assumptions
You may be dating someone from a traditionally reserved culture; however, your partner may actually be quite extroverted. Don’t let cultural stereotypes dictate your understanding of your partner. Instead, let direct knowledge of your partner (his/her personality and opinions) inform your understanding. Additionally, some aspects of your partner’s cultural identity may be more (or less) important to him/her, so learn what matters most to your partner. Carefully discuss any expectations for the relationship and/or marriage that may be influenced by your upbringing; these factors may include perspectives on gender roles, intimacy, finances and the holidays.
Be Patient
While society is generally now more accepting of inter-cultural relationships, many families still object, especially in the beginning stages of the relationship. Some parents persist in this resistance, even to the point of disowning their children. However, most families become more accepting of such relationships over time. Often, concerns about inter-cultural (and in particular, inter-racial) relationships are couched in terms of the impact on any potential children. While, even today, multiracial children may still encounter certain challenges, the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry notes that such children are likely to celebrate diversity and appreciate being brought up with the benefit of various cultures. If you initially encounter resistance from your family, try not to be too reactionary. Instead, patiently affirm to your family your respect for your partner and the specific things you value in him or her. Hopefully, they will grow to love your partner as much as you do.
Plan for the Future
Cultural differences often become more acute when it comes to getting married or having children. Once a relationship becomes serious, you may have to make important decisions about where the wedding will be held, if/where you will worship and how your children will be raised. For example, if your partner regularly attends church, but you want to continue going to synagogue, your choices might include: 1) attend your respective services alone 2) rotate the weeks you attend at each location or 3) go to both services each week together. Cultural differences can also affect parenting decisions such as discipline, helping your child define and understand his/her cultural identity and what language(s) will be spoken in the home.